Women Who Want a “Ring” or to Keep Theirs — Need to Understand These 2 Truths.

Women Who Want a “Ring” or to Keep Theirs — Need to Understand These 2 Truths.

Shocker — it isn’t all about sex, affection, or your ability to forgive him. 

Ladies, this post is for you today. I’m noticing a problematic relationship trend ranging from early “lovebirds” to seasoned “veteran” relationships. 

I intend to provide a perspective articulating the two things men NEED most in a relationship. No matter where your relationship is — if you want him to “ring” you up or want to keep that ring…you need to be mindful of these at all times. 

Disclaimer: It takes two to tango. Seek to understand both partner's moves. 

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Feel free to share your opinion in the comments. 


Truth #1: Peace

Ask yourself this one question…is your man running home to you or calling you randomly?

No? Oh no, what could be wrong? 

Yes, relationships naturally ebb and flow, but there is much more to it than that. 

Well — here’s the first truth. You don’t provide him peace. 

Let me explain here. 

Men receive constant criticism and demands everywhere they look. We have two choices: deal with it or not deal with it.

Good men will elect to deal with whatever situation they’re facing, but they will respond with action rather than words. 

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In my observations, you ladies have layers of emotional support embedded into your life. You will talk about your issues for ten hours before you do something. It could be a generalization, but I'm highlighting a fundamental difference. 

Men process life in action…women process life in relationship. 

It does not come naturally for men to discuss the hardships of their day because they elect to solve them and move on. Hence, why you are probably frustrated with your man giving you solutions often compared to just listening to your daily stressors? 

Circling this all back to peace, if you are constantly nagging, adding stressors, or demanding from your man, you can expect some feedback, but eventually, a man will respond with action. 

That action will be avoiding you, less desire to see you, or even leaving you. 

Peace in a relationship results from what you do or say to your partner. 

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Social status, religious affiliation, and finances alone may convince a man to commit to you, but the relationship will crumble without peace.

A man’s actions are your early warning signs when a relationship is going south. I promise you that peace is at the root of it.

What you do or say in those moments of tension is essential. 


Truth #2: Respect

Ladies, do you know that squirmish feeling when your man mails you a handwritten letter or surprises you with flowers? 

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It makes you feel unique and cherished, right? 

I’d bet that’s when you feel best in your relationship. 

Men, on the other hand, would rather be respected. Respect is not rocket science. Treat your man with dignity and how you would want to be treated. 

Disrespect can occur when you ladies are critical and use a harsh, commanding, or condescending tone when speaking to your man. 

Maybe it’s not directly to your man, which is even more disrespectful. 

If your man walks away feeling like a child or inadequate, I promise he won’t jump out of his way to surprise you. Why reward bad behavior?

!!!The worst form of disrespect is crossing a boundary!!! 

A boundary is there for a reason. Your partner has trusted you with a vulnerability, saying, “This X thing makes me feel Y. Please don’t do X, or I’ll C-you later.” 

As someone who has been on both ends of this, I can say that it 100% boils down to the violator's self-centeredness. 

Can forgiveness be had for crossing a boundary? I honestly don’t know. Trust is hard to regain. It takes the violator to act actively to show the other person they didn’t mean it and that it won’t happen again. 

But that begs the greater question: if someone truly loves you, wouldn’t they do anything for you? Would they not want to regain that trust?

Ladies, if you truly love that man, you must step outside what’s natural to you. If your man is hurting, you must communicate through action. 

Venting to your friends and family comes naturally to you and will make you feel nice in the short term, but remember they are always on your side and will tell you what will make you “feel” better. Deep down — you will always know the truth. 

Ahh, okay, okay, Brandon….let’s stay on track. 

By now, you probably recognize a connection here — respect and peace go hand in hand.

However, I want to highlight that there’s a vicious cycle once conflict arises in a relationship! 

At the heart of most conflict in relationships is that women “feel” unloved and men “feel” disrespected. 

How do you break this cycle? 

Someone has to move first, but how do we do that when neither wants to budge?

Ah, I have a couple of thoughts on that. 

Stay tuned. 

Brandon 

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